ooOh so daNk

NEW USERNAME!!

2004-12-01T05:06:00Z

i will no longer write in here..sorry folks.

the new username is now lushuzxstar

make sure yuh add me ;] later looooves <3

diam0nd_x0 @ 2004-11-30T21:45:00

2004-12-01T02:46:04Z

i'm closing this journal & making a new one!

i'll put the name on here when i'm done...

Just A Picture

2004-11-25T01:57:41Z

made this for am <3
I LUV HER!

Why Yuh Eyes So Chinky?

2004-11-12T03:14:03Z

updating just to update!

today did nothing really.. we just had a chillax day lol. we were gonna rent "we were soldiers" but we couldn't find it so instead we watched save the last dance and in a couple mins gonna watch coyote ugly or i guess we're gonna go get money so we can get some mary jane =]

lol anywhom......i gave up all other drugs. had a long talk w/ my ma annnd settled some stuff. i hung out with dennine the other nite, we went to her apartment n that was fun. with the exception of getting ripped off by schmitty and steve ryan. they took a dime bag outta our 20 bag, pretty fuckn grimy!! they're SUPPOSED to be our friends.

i suggest not buying from them ;]

moving on, tomorrow i would have ALA but i'm not going back til next monday. this week was a completely miss school week. lol bah bah bah bah bahhh i'm luvin it. haha lovely. i'm outta here !

payce bitches <3 mwuah

she says "thats the cutest thing you ever did see"
^^^ lol

diam0nd_x0 @ 2004-11-04T19:58:00

2004-11-05T01:03:41Z

suppose i'll update sometime soon...
its been a while!

unfortunately i'm way too high to do that now<3

my life isn't great but i feel good sometimes
not happy, never happy, but good...
good is better then the usual tears evrynite.

i still have NOTHiNG !

except my friends + family
which is EVERYTHiNG to me soo
this is grand =]

lol and i'm officially a stoner...i smoke evryday
and yuh know what, i LUV it !!

if you got a problem then FUCK YOU.

U S H E R

2004-10-13T16:41:53Z

i am only updating this because of my fucking hott absolutely SEXY gorgeous new husband named Usher Raymond The 4th!

GODDD i went to the concert last nite w/ Candace and lemmie tell you, USHER rocked the arena! had to be the best day of my life i swear....i love him so freakn much its unbelievable.

so wait let me tell yuh how it went down.. we got to the place and we're outside with the radio stations and fly 92 had some dude on there who was a new artist or whatever so he started singing, which was pretty hot<3 then he throws out wads of cash and i SWEAR that i had it in my hand for a minute but then out of nowhere i get tackled by madd people and Candace ended up getting some cause her mom blocked her (cheaater lol). then we decide we're gonna go inside after just chillen going w/ the crowd for a while. we go in get shirts then sit down and wait for the first one to come out who was Christina Milian. she's soo damn pretty. we were dead center on the top but it was a GREAT seat. we couldn't see her though they didn't zoom in on her but we heard her and she's got the cutest voice you'd ever hear. she was wearing some hot pink outfit *MADD CUTE* lol and she sang like 2 songs that i didn't know then she sung Dip It Low and had all-a tha ladies sing it with her.

NEXT up was K A N Y E W E S T!!!<3

SO he comes on stage and he just rocked the arena for a while singin madd hott songs and shit. he was dancing n jumping around stage and he is not gorgeous like my man Usher but he most def. is fucking adorable i can't even explain me n Candace were like awhh he is the cutest guy ever. then his piano guy was doing some god song and we're like whattt ? then what starts jammin? "J e s u s waaaalks" lol i was like HELL YEAUUH!!! so we're all screaming at the top of our lungs to Christina n mainly Kanye then he got off stage =[

it was intermission time so we make a break for some drinks because our throats were burning. well we're in some line and out of nowhere this security person does like a dive towards the floor and a mob of little kids go rushing in and they never got caught lol. it was pretty funny. soo i got myself a diet pepsi and we go back to our seats and they were like "is everyone ready for USSHHHERR?" all-a the people started SCREAMING. then they played some more music so we're all like wtf is this shit lol they teased us. well Usher finally came on and through-out the ENTIRE concert everyone was just scrrreamming for him. yall don't understand i almost cried in the first song it was the best concert in my entire life and i knew it would be hott cause he's my FAV. singer and Kanye's most adorable. USHER though let me tell you...he's SOOOO f-ing gorgeous that evry girl in there musta orgasmed when he ripped off that shirt !! he only did it once though and idk how to explain it the whole concert was screaming and people crying everywhere and whenever he smiled everyone went craaaazy. he had dance moves like whoa and he stuck his hand in his pants once *automatic orgasm* jesus he's so gorgeous. he had the hottest songs and he was sayn the hottest shit and we were all singing along and when Burn came on and You Got It Bad i coulda cried soo hard cause it was just awesome. OUT OF FUCKING CONTROL<3333

he completely stole my heart!

the whole nite thats all i could think of...

HIS SCHEXXXYNESS<33

but i'm out i wrote enough, if you got Usher coming near you then you need to fucking go cause you'll be missing a hell-a hott concert and TRUST ME you don't want to miss it at alllll.

TRUTH TOUR 2004
.:Usher & Kanye:.

Don't Feel Good

2004-10-04T22:34:35Z

Okay I'm going to update again even though its only been about a day. So last night we ended up playing upwords and uno [with my mom, Mike, Amanda, and Dennine] for a while. Then we ate dinner. Later I went to go to sleep after much computer time and it was about 12 we decided we couldn't sleep so we smoked. After that I passed out.

This morning I woke up with a headache. Still went to school anyway after Dennine hurried me out the door. When I got to school I had Health first period and we were in the computer lab which is much better then the classroom and I got to do some diet things. Finished that up then I did a little bit of extra credit. After that I had Global 10 and luckily we had a subsitute. Although we had to write a DBQ on the French Revolution. I wrote a little bit of an essay and then wrote a note back and forth with Cookie talking about plans for this weekend and such. My nose was running all day, I had a headache, and then I'd start to feel really nauseous. Of course I had gym today which just made my day SO lovely. I hate gym and if I never told you this before then I will now: everyday I have gym is a day I hate. We were playing lacrosse and I had to run a lot.

Well after gym I had lunch and I felt like I was going to pass out. Wonderful, that meant I had to make a visit to the nurse so I went there and of course she was a bitch to me. After that I walked to Paiges then called home for a ride.

I came back then chilled with Amanda for a while. She got suspended today because her and Nicole are fighting. We dropped Shane off at work and then got some fries from McDonalds. Then we smoked in the most ghetto way ever. Okay get this, the bowl broke so we had to keep holding it together. They were resin hits and we didn't have a lighter so we had to put a piece of paper in the toaster then light a candle then we used cutips to light the bowl and we'd cut them in half so that we could throw the halves in the wine glass. Lol it looked pretty cool for a while and it was like a little smoke device thingy.

Haha so that was cool. I've been sitting around all day..feeling like shit. I'm going to go watch TV now but I feel like shit so I'm probably not going to school tomorrow. My mom talked to the homeschooling program which told me that the only diploma I could get for that is GED. I can't wait until November so that I can get the hell out of that school I hate it SO much.

Alright, I'm out. Still no date for homecoming and Cookie will probably never get around to talking it over with Shane which means I'm fucked.

Leave em' for me<3

Long Time No Talk

2004-10-04T02:31:32Z

Haven't done a real update lately soo whatever heres whats new in my
*oh so interesting* life lol. RIIIIGHT!

Well as I already mentioned Dennine came back. We def. partied it up that weekend..I don't think I can really say what we did but lets just say we got fucked up in the best ways possible. So that whole weekend chilled w/ the normal weekendenders! Which would be CoOkie [kaythrin], ButTerfLy [dennine], and PriNcezZ [amanda]. My stripper/porn star name would be TriXxie. So if you've noticed I'm using that then that is why lol, just little nicknames and i like em' so whatever.

This week I went to school once. Of course my mother and I had a very important conversation about that and she's going to pull me out of school in November after my birthday!! Woot and my mom was looking up home schooling programs which is pretty dank. Anyway I'm going to get a job and not be bumming it major like my brothers and then next year I'm going to take the GED [unless the homeschooling works] and then I'll be set for college and doing a job that i actually want to do. Tuesday Dennine and I got a little fucked up off our fav. drug lol. All week I've been getting high. Friday we got real fucked up and i ended up staying up all night long and went to the dentist all fucked up practically passing out in the chair. The car outside was moving and shit it was all crazyness.

Its already sunday again meaning i have school tomorrow morning which most def. sucks ass. Yesterday i went to the dentist and then to look at homecoming dresses at the Wilton Mall. Well there was no real purty dresses there. Only like black + pink which isn't gonna work with my hair color this year, i want something gold thats just wicked pretty. So i came home and all night long dennine, my mom, and i played upwords then played uno. By 12 we all lost our mind. My mother was laughing so hard that she was crying, Dennine just was tired and being retarded, and i was falling asleep as we were playing. Haha it was crazy. Today i woke up at like 2 in the afternoon and just chilled around the house eating and getting fat because i start my diet tomorrow. Its gonna suck i'm gonna have to diet because homecomings coming up!

anyways ... i don't have much to say soo i'm gonna go to bed now.
leave some comments for me yuh lovely bitches<3333

Survey Thingy

2004-09-27T13:37:35Z

[don't actually kill yourself for not reading]

well am if your reading i def. stole this :o)

.:n o r m a l:.
Time started:: 8:53 AM [but my comp. time is wrong]
Name:: sanya
Age:: 15
Age act:: haha depends on my mood
Birthday:: nov. 28 and IM me for my address to send the presents that i very much expect

.:l a s t | t h i n g | y o u:.
Ate:: an oatmeal cookie or a rice crispy treat whichever i ate last before bed i don't really remember
Drank:: nasty cola i hate it all i like now is diet
Watched:: suttin on VH1 like a talent show of little red-headed boys or something crazy that dennine put on when i wanted to watch the cosby show then rosanne!
Listened to:: caramel remix by city high

.:i f | y o u | w e r e:.
A crayon, what color would you be, why:: i could quote this and say "white so nobody would use me" but i'm not that gay so i'm gonna say pink cause its my fav. color
A pie, which flavor would it be, why:: apple cause it rocks
An element, which would it be, why:: air because hopp put it lol and i don't feel like picking one, ahh lazyness i know i know it must be another side effect of hunger [grab a twix]

.:w h a t | w o u l d | y o u | do:.
If you were handed a spork:: i'd play with it? idk who's handing it to me and why?
If someone told you to dance with a sheep:: i'd say you find one n then you get the money your going to pay me for it and yes i'll prolly do it
Said, there best friend was imaginary:: i'd say you have problems but so does my imaginary best friend...
Said, they were here to kill you:: tell them to shut up
Said, they were your stalker:: tell them that if they ever watch me again i'll stick my shoe up their ass and it wouldn't be too comfy
If someone picked your nose:: say thanks<3
If you were hugged by a stranger:: think that i must have been drunk/fucked up and met this person before n not realized it lol then ponder at what i did last night

.:t e l l | m e:.
Do you own any sporks, if so how many:: sure, 6.9 of them
Exactly how many forks are in your utensils drawer:: i'd count but i suddenly broke my leg and am therefore disabled from reaching the kitchen
What about knives:: read above
What utensil do you eat ice cream with:: spoon style seems to work good
Do you think i have an infatuation with utensils:: uhh yeah lol
Whats the title of the book closest to you:: haha the book i begged chad n my mom to buy me called "1,003 Great Things To Smile About"
Using the book, go to page 126, line 19, and give me the first sent:: its not a book w/ actual writings in it its actually just a book with like 3-4 crazy things that should supposevely be something to smile about and it has little sections like "Sounds That Bring A Smile" which is what page 126 is but i'll write down all the supposevely sounds that make you smile: 1) the crashing of the surf 2) the wind howling outside while you're snug in bed 3) your son practicing for his bar mitzvah when he doesn't know you're listening...............yes the author was a crackhead lol a jewish one

.:f a v o r i t e:.
Quote:: any that'd relate to what i feel at the time
Cheese:: def. representing motzerella
Smile-e face:: haha :o) <--that one
Horror movie:: uhmm idk if it was horror but me n am watched it a million times maybe its more thriller but i forgot the name? lol so maybe i should just say joy ride AHH !!
Toothpaste:: i think its crest but its got like 3 extreme flavor things and its speermint [sp?] peppermint n cinn.<333 or i liked the little kid kinds w/ sparkles that toothepaste is soo fucking good like cream yourself good

.:r a n d o m | s t u f f:.
Best hair color:: i like a really dark brown almost black but brown w/ like an ashy blonde highlights and thick brown caramel colored ones, that'd be hott i like the way i have mine now too cause i always wanted it like this so "bah bah bah bah bahhh i'm lovin' it"
Best hair style:: either straight [when it looks okay] or curled w/ curling iron orrr anything with curls n straightness is daaaankness
Have many friends:: i thought i used to but i guess not really but i don't care all the friends i DO have are awesome n i luv them very much
How many are imaginary:: only 3 1/2
Boys name:: i like when they start with a J but basically anything cool
Girls name:: i LOVE the name carmella [although some 9th grade girl gave it a bad look and i really don't like her very much at all] and trina or katrina something along those lines i love uhhm i like the name lisa too and ambers a pretty cool name uhhm anything REALLY cool n crazy n i love it i'm sure

.:f i l l | i n | t h e | b l a n k s:.
I wish i was: not single
P. Sherman, Wallabe: way sounds right [copied that from am] but god i love that movie lol the little orange fish amuses me evvverytime
Your my: babys daddy
You smell like:: old wrinklayy ashed up cigg. skunk TURD..but I on the otherhand smell like victoria's secrets love spell which is my fav. perfume ever

.:c a n | y o u:.
Touch your tounge to your nose:: nope i come sort of close though
Raise up one eyebrow:: i think i'm doing it
Whistle:: no but i always tried when i was little
Snap your fingers:: of course
Rub your tummy and pat your head at the same time:: yeah but when i pat my head it kinda circles around in that type of pattern haha
Make your tounge into the shape of a clover:: ha no i'm not that talented i think i'll settle with snapping my fingers n such

.:o d d | s t u f f:.
Like getting stuck in traffic:: urghh NO i don't think anyone does
Do you make signs and wave to people when you are:: no i usually start to flip shit but if i have paper n all-a that i'm gonna do that lol thanks for the idea
What color are your pjs:: wtf i don't have just one pair but i usually will wear a tanktop w/ my gray pants that say sexy in navy blue on the buttox region
Do you draw:: uhhm occasionally i'll draw crazy shit
How well do you think you do 1-10:: i suck at it..1 or maybe 2 OR 2.7? but i'm passing art lol so thats cool
Could you play the drums with your ears:: never tried but i don't think my ears are too talented and i won't put too much faith in them for that
Would you shake a can of soda then give it to a friend:: haha yeah any of them so this is probably a warning to my friends DON'T DRINK MY SODAS ANYMORE
Do blue lolly pops attrack you:: yes they remind me of smiiirf<3
Is your mind always in the gutter:: always? usually but sometimes i pick it out n clean it off

.:m o r e | r a n d o m:.
Do you have a fetish of anything:: maybe the computer and hmm drugs lol i luv em'
If so what, if not why not:: i just named what start reading what i'm writing asshole lol
Do you own a tutu:: no i think maybe i did when i was younger
Would you wear a tutu to school/public:: not to school and maybe in public depending on where
What is something thats physically impossible:: i'll go with the tounge to the ear theory
Would you ever do it:: lets think about this if its physically impossible then nooo but i would try it [just did n what do yuh know it didn't work]
Would you ever play chicken with a train:: haha no, hopefully not
Do you make animals noises:: sometimes i moo
If you could become a squirrel, would you:: maybe for like a day and i bet i'd be the only one smart enough to stay out of the road and not become roadkill [or reverse that i'd prolly be roadkill]
Time ended:: 9:28 AM thanks to much interruptions from zoro trying to chew up my entire room

hotttt shiiiit, okay i'm done WEE!

Woot Woot!

2004-09-25T18:16:34Z

We got hell-a fucked up.

Dennines back<3

Sunday Mornin'

2004-09-19T16:10:36Z

Ook so its been a while since an actual update. I'm just gonna prolly write about my trip to see Dennine and then about yesterday and today because i don't feel like remember all-a the other shit i did.

So yesterday i wake up early morning at 7:30 to wait for Dennines mom to come n get me. She called to let me know that she was gonna be running a little late, well okay no problem i'll just chill for a few minutes. Her mom shows up and we go get Dennine a stereo and 2 CD's for while she's there. We get there the guy has Dennine come out and she ran up n gave me a big hug then her mom asked for one and she said "no i really hate you" and then she shut the door and started talking about how completely miserable she is. Her mom n her fought for quite a while and Dennine was crying and i felt really damn bad. It was sad to see her so upset...but she made her mom sit in the car for a while and showed me the place and the place itself is not too too bad. Well until you got people monitoring your every fucking move and don't let you do anything.

"..this ~~won't~~ be punishment for you."

Lying piece of shit. She has to say "may I enter?" before she walks into the kitchen, she can't talk to Claude because he's a boy and they aren't allowed to do ANYTHING with boys. Dennine has to be in bed at 9 and wake up at 7. She wakes up at 7 and spends her day reading a book and crying and trying to think of something to do. She hasn't had a cigg. in days and hasn't smoked weed in days either and my guess is that she's going insanely crazy. I can tell she is. She kept saying this to her mom..

"i had my life all figured out *tear* then you fucked it all up."

It pisses me off so much. Her case worker told her that she was proud of Dennine for doing that and a bunch of shit that was obviously lies. Who can honestly feel proud about that? Lets take a girl away from everything she's ever known when she is finally getting her LIFE in order because we think it might help her. Yeah i wish i could fucking kill whoever decided thats best for her. Everyone there tells her she shouldn't be there but there's nothing they can do about it. Thats all anyone tells her is "there's nothing i can do about it" well then let the girl talk to someone who CAN do something about it. I feel so bad for her. She didn't put herself in there, her parents did. Why is she being punished for what her parents have done? Thats so fucked up. My mom is taking me this weekend to go and visit her so I'm hoping that in doing this my mom will see how horrible it is for her there and i hope Dennine starts bawling her eyes out so that my mom can see how miserable she's been being there. They're enrolling her in 9th grade into a school she doesn't know with people she doesn't know and a bunch of them being 13yrs old. She's not allowed to swear, she's not allowed to hangout with Claude. The boys have their own living room, their own table when they eat, and their own place in the car so she can't interact with ANY boys. Only other person she can hangout with is this girl Shantel who is the only other girl there and is into cheerleading and is def. not Dennines type at all. She has to do chores, has to try and sleep with people walking in every 15mins to shine a flashlight on her. Real cool. I wish people woulda placed me into that kind of environment. NOT!

So that pissed me off the rest of the day. I finally had to leave and yeah well the ride home wasn't too bad, i slept. I keep remembering how she said

"I really truely n honestly hate my life right now"

I sure do miss Dennine :o(

Uggh anyways...i came home and saw the new puppy Zoro. He's hell-a cute!! I love him so much already lol. I ran outside n ran all over playing with him but Misty got jealous. Whenever I decide to get better pictures of him I'll post em.

Got school tomorrow, grrrreat. Still no date for homecoming but i had one offer lol thanks to Britt<3 but yeah other then that. Not so great w/ offerings.

Mmk well i'm out i think i'm gonna get in the shower or something.

Leave comments<33

Cam. Whor-ing It Again!

2004-09-14T17:52:05Z

Alright. So i've gone a little wild with the camera being suspended n everything yuh know it just gets kind of boring! Lol anywhom...don't make fun of me, if you don't like them just don't bother saying anything.

why hello there!

lookin all pissed lol.

that picture sorta reminds me of Avril Lavigne?

whatttts up?

UGH..got my stomache in there.

kinda weird, kinda cool.

laying down.

i was like leaning over/taking a pic.

lol doesn't it look so fake?

fiiiinally, i'm done.

...Mmk..you came, you saw, thats all<3

She's Gone :o(

2004-09-13T13:06:56Z

After all-a this time and i was so excited about Dennine moving in then this bullshit happens. I'm so sad right now, Dennine is gone. She's getting put away in a fucking home. This sucks so much...she'd just moved in with us and everything was finally going right in her life and then the state took her away. They're such idiots and I hope that Dennine made them feel like COMPLETE shit when they take her away. I feel so alone right now I'm not used to not having her here.

I wanna cry :o(

Lemmie tell yuh the whole story. I've been going to school and doing all-a my work and just trying to pass so I can graduate. I dropped English 11 because I felt like it was just way too much. They shouldn't have put me in that many classes yuh know? Okay well I guess the other day when Chad and Shane came to pick up Amanda and I, Chad yelled to Shane "yo faggot dipshit your girlfriend is waiting for you" and then Mr. Stratton (the new assistant principal) was like "hey you, get over here" then he started to get in Chads face and Chad was like "fuck you..get the fuck outta my face" and the guy backed away..they fought....whatever yuh know they just argued and then walked away to go home and Shane just walked right back the guy. So next day Shane comes to pick up Amanda and I and Officer Goldmen goes up to Shane and was like "you were banned from here, next time I see yuh here you could get arrested" and a buncha bullshit. Amanda and I walk up to them and we're like "uhhm my brother drops n picks me up every single day you can't ban him what is this bullshit?" and Mr. Stratton cut us off and was like "well then you can walk" and Amanda n I both go "FUCK THAT" at the same time and walked away. We were sitting in the car and they came up to the window like they own it or something. They're like "you could've handled that without swearing" and I'm like "FUUUUUCK, ASSSS, SHIIIIT" all slow n long lol and Mr. Stratton goes "I know your names" i'm like "I don't give a fuck if you know my name or not you fucking faggot motherfucker, you'll be talking to my mom anyways" and we drove away lol. Then later in the afternoon I got a letter home saying that I'm suspended for 3 days. Thats why I'm home and writing this right now..

So I'm wicked pissed off, then I come home and get the phone handed to me from Paige saying that its Dennine and she's getting sent away to a home. I get on the phone and Dennine tells me that the county wants to take her away to the same crazy home as Claude. Well I was like "no thats not happening" and I hung up with her to call my mom and she came over while I was crying my eyes out to my mom and we both started crying. Then my mom said we should tell Dennine they can't do that and that she should go somewhere. Well, Dennine finds a place to go and we have Shane drop her off. My mom calls and says that theres nothing we can do because her parents gave up custody of her last feb. so she's been custody of the state. Now she's getting written down as a run away or some shit. Later my mom drives to go get Dennine and I started crying on the way there and my mom was like "why are you crying" and I'm like "JUST DRIVE" and we got Dennine then went to Memory Lane. We figure out maybe she can stay for the weekend but she'll have to go to a home for a little bit.

Now thats the point we're up. Chilled with the girls, went school supply shopping. Last night Dennine n I started crying for a little bit talking about her leaving. Drove to Bonfaire to get some shit for her last night here. Dennine, Mike, and I all smoked a nice ass blunt. After that we just went upstairs and passed out. This morning I woke up to my mom saying "you have school 2:30-4:00 don't forget" and then she made Dennine give her a hug goodbye and told her to call us when she got to the home. Then we blazed madd bowls and then her mom was here. I made her mom feel like shit by pretending to bawl my eyes out when saying goodbye to Dennine lol and then we all said goodbye. After that Mike, Josh, and I were all sitting upstairs and it was just like..weird. It was already weird knowing that Dennine wasn't chillen there with us and knowing that this time she won't be coming back for possibly feb. and thats so far away. We were talking about how excited we are that its almost all-a the holidays and she won't be here for them. Its crazy and I'm getting so much older that I'm gonna hafta learn to say goodbye to all my friends in a year or so because when they graduate, most of them are gone and when they're gone its almost impossible to keep in touch. Prolly lose them all. I gotta try to make the best out of everything but its sad to think I'm losing all my friends. I feel so crazily sad right now.

Will I ever get a boyfriend?

.....I'm starting to think I won't....

So now I'm just thinking of EVERYTHING I possibly can. Mostly thinking about how much I luv my friends I have and how I can't picture myself without any of them. I feel like even though we're all still here I'm losing them all right now.

Well I'm out..not feeling too good :o(
<33comment for luv!

School Started Again

2004-09-09T03:49:44Z

Alright so school started 2 days ago..on the 7th. I got my schedule and they put me in madd classes and I'm gonna try n pass this year but its gonna be really hard. I'm doubled up in Global and English, I got Earth Science EVERYDAY, I got Studio Art with a lot of 9th graders which SUCKS. Also my gym class is shitty except Bootsy is in there and we share a locker so whatevvver. Not many friends in my classes, Jocelyn is in my Earth Science but isn't my partner because she's "upper classman" even though I AM TOO! Then Earl is in my English 10 as well as Marissa and I got KayThrin in my Global 10 and Natasha...its cool. Lol..I wanted to get switched so that Amanda & I were in the same Earth Science class but thats not happening because the school is so strict about that shit.

I did my homework tonight but i haven't got any supplies yet. Today didn't do too much...uhhmmm went with Dennine to get ciggs from her mom and then just chilled at my house. Wrote an essay lol and took a shower. Just ate madd food. Didn't blaze which sucks. Oh yeah!!

NeEne Moved In

I got my mom to let her live with us officially. That rocks lol even though she pretty much lived here already. Right now I'm just updating this since its been a while and waiting for my hair to dry so I can straighten it. I'm madd tired so after this I'm just gonna go to sleep then got school in the AM. Dennine brings me annnd then I meet KayThrin in the morning at the van and we walk in together. I love my friends lol they're so awesome! Kel, Dennine, KayThrin, and I went shopping the other day. Kelli stole madd shit lol and did it right in front of this lady it was craaaazy.

I'm really tired so I'm just gonna straighten my hair, put my laundry in and then go to sleep. Leave some comments if yuh wanna<3

Anything But Ordinary

2004-09-03T19:24:33Z

Mmk....soo my effin life. Lol.. well on Candaces b-day i got to hangout with her which was def. much fun! Haha i miss hangin out with her we used to be SOO close until fuckn Nathan. Urggh jk Nathan its not all your fault lol. So that was cool. After she came over we ended up schmoookin! I was pretty damn high then my mom came home to tell me it was time for my hair appointment. Yehh went to that..and practically fell asleep while tha lady did my hair lol. It ended up taking really long so after I got home I saw Kelli, Amanda, and KayThrin chillen at my house. Then within minutes Dennine rolled up. Haha mm so we were gonna chill with Itchy for a little bit but Dennine was way too tired. I had thought i was wicked tired but ended up staying up all night having a HUGE convo with Mike n KayThrin. We'll keep the info on that private lol.

So next day..i woke up n KayThrin was gone (as usual being a SLAVE to her momma) and Dennine was gone too lol i think? Anyway Dennine ended up coming back over or somethn and we were gonna go up to KayThrins camp. Well her mom was slaving her with the horses..so we tried giving her some lessons so that she wasn't so mommy-whipped. Didn't work at all lol. So we decided we'd wait til 3 and we went to get money from Dennines mom then we were gonna walk downtown Toga for a little bit but decided not to. Instead we went right to KayThrins house. Waited for her to do her chores. Fell in love with her dog Pongo<3 (real name Fidget). Lol its sooo cute its a lil dalmation and she's just AWHH! So yepp then KayThrin was ready to go and we went up to her camp thingy to go swimming. Well i wanted to tan while KayThrin and Neene wanted to swim. We took out the boat and I actually got to canoe for a little while but i sucked so i stopped lol. Very tiring..then we were in the middle of the lake and put out an anchor. Took like 25 minutes of talking before Dennine said "CHRIST" and jumped in first haha and then KayThrin did this look of falling in as she jumped in. I tried tanning, didn't work too well because the sun left. We walked back to KayThrins campsite tryna get her to beat up her mom or somethn crazy like that. Dug our feet in dirt then kidnapped KayThrin.

Yehh I def. said KIDNAPPED! Lol we were like "we're not taking you back I hope you know that" and we got an exit up from tha lake before KayThrin had flipped out on us so much we decided we'd have her call her mom n ask her then bring her back. Well her mom said she was being a bitch (which she wasn't) soo then we brought her home. Dennine & I were supposed to go up to Dennines camp and chill with Itchy n Bill. Didn't work out as planned because we saw Dennines mom on the way back to my house and she said she changed her mind and was going up to camp because she was fighting with her dad. Yeh that sucked so we went to Subway saw this PEEEEIMP girl lol. Went back to my house called up Itchy n Bill and decided we'd just stay at my house and drink.

Went to get Itchy n Bill..even Critt for a little while. Then we stayed here and just chilled all night til Dennine had to bring Bill to work. Yeah that was like 6ish AM and i passed out til 2 somethn. Which is good norm. I woulda just slept til 1. I'm still tired though so that sucks.

Today I'm waiting for my mom to get home so i can go TANNING! Then we're seeing whats up at Dennines camp and if nothings goin on we're coming back here and idk what. I kinda feel like having a just chill night? I kinda wanna hangout with MiSs HerRick too if she's not too busy but she usually is lol. Hmmm so yehh i'll update some other time laaaters i suppose.

Luv yuhhhs and if yuh wanna chill tonight or suttin..
....let me know! Lol comment for me too<3

My New Hair Style

2004-09-02T05:00:40Z

Alriiight..got my hair done<333

1.)
Top view..

2.)
Hehh, dorkin style

3.)
Lol juuuust chillen

4.)
"Who you callin bitch?"

5.)
Just keep smiiiiling :o)

6.)
HmMm dee dumMmm

7.)
Don't mind the bags on my eyes

8.)
Theres the last one

Mmk..well, I like it..and I haven't curled it yet i'm kinda excited for that to see what it looks like..but yehh i like it so far. I don't care what anyone thinks bout it lol cause i know some people will hate it and others will be like mm its alright.

2 More of my SCHEXXXXY Neene!

1.)
Ohh la*la!!

2.)
She's a hippie lol

Thats all...I'm out now! Laaaater folks. Comment.

This One's For My #1 Bitch

2004-09-01T17:03:17Z

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CANDACE!!!

Sweeeeeet Sixteeen

Luv yuhh soo much<3

Make A Change

2004-09-01T08:21:11Z

So its tuesday now..guess what today is besides that though? Its tha 31st n I was *supposed* to get my hair done today. Had Dennine drop me off cause i wanted to make sure I was here for my appointment today. Welllll my mom blows it off lol and she said tomorrow we'll go. She made an appointment at C & C Unisex at 6:30 and well I'm still excited!

Anyway I got my eyebrows done saturday and that felt good, and my mom bought me new panties lol which is actually pretty funny this kid Jay i know was ringn them up for me.

Got my new hott ass Donnie Darko layout butttt now i wanna do it like my icon for AIM soo i'm tryin to hook that up right now. Okay soo tonight was fun.. Amanda Shane and I went up to KayThrins campsite. Of course we schmoooked before goin there outta his bong. As soon as we get there Donny (KayThrins CUTE bro) dropped us off at the lake and we took the boat out and went to the middle of the lake and were blazing it was awesome. Kinda scary lol and Amanda of course wanted to row it for a while soo she did that and almost lost the oars so we were like fuuck thatt Shane can do it again. KayThrin had brought CHEESE PUFFS on the boat and gingerale and it was SO nice lol. I wanna go back up there sometime, maybe even this week. Hmm though after that we started walkn up the hill then blazed again lol then walked back to the campsite cause Donny went to ~~sleep~~ with his girlfriend. Supposevely *wink,wink* hahaha. Yehh then we decided we're gonna come back here so we just came back.

After a while i went downstairs..harrassed Chad and got tickled to death lol. Then smoked a joint with Mike, Amanda, and KayThrin. After that Amanda went upstairs and got Shanes keys and Mike drove us to Bonfaire and smoked with us on the way there. At Bonfaire i got a cappachino (spelling?) and it tasted SO good. Jealous? I know, I know...haha anyway..then he brought us back and i just came up herre.

Now i'm updating cause its been a few days. Well what was up when i left off..? Saturday annnnd I never did go to that party I think because there wasn't one or something? Idk but KayThrin had me hooked up with some orgasmic smelling shampoo and it smells soooo incredibly good. I'm lovin it lol. I went to the mall sunday with Dennine and Kt annnd I got new sunglasses, a new shit (thank you KayThrin!!), earrings, and Burger King. Ohh yehh hott shit right there. I saw these playboy bunny shoes i wanted and i was pretty happy bout that.

On monday I chilled with Dennine and Shannon. We just went to BroadAlbin and I met FLANDERS. Wow lemmie tell yuh, what a guy. He's sooo crazy and he was telling us about how he stole flowers from a cemetary n shit and brings them home for his wife and then later that night she's like "did you see what my wonderful husband brought me" lol and she's like "i taught him everything" haha. They're craaaackheads. Worse then Patrick the Surfer dude. EHHH!

Found out Shannon fucked Stevie while we were together. Lol, what a relationship we had. So yeah I guess Stevie was telling her that me n him broke up or some bullshit soo fuck him. Fuck guys seriously some of them are just straight a WASTE OF TIME. I wish they'd stop being so damn immature about shit. Psshh can't trust any of them anymore.

Cleaned my room up today, went through alla my old school shit, vaccuumed, and did laundry. I love gettin everything cleaned so that I don't gotta worry about doing it another day. Oh i also made a new s/n for AIM its now luShuz x stAr soo add that if yuh don't got it.

I think I wrote a lot in here for now so I'm gonna stop and try to make this thing look purtyful again which is doubtful but whatevvvuh. Leave some comments for me!

Payce<3

Better Left Unsaid

2004-08-28T17:32:02Z

Alright so its finally saturday. In 3 more days I get my hair done and I'm pretty excited. Although my eyebrows can't wait so my mom is gonna take me tonight to get them done.

I chilled with Kelli, Kt, and Mike the other night, that was pretty fun lol. Kelli and I are so crazy sometimes. We showed them our old "Dreaming Of You" routine thing lol and we totally sucked this time because we forgot everything. So we pretty much danced until we got hungry. Mike (with his car there) calls up his friend Adam so that he can bring us to go get food. Well his friend actually said yes lol so woo I got $3 from my mom and then Kt mentioned having $30 so we're like well fuck yeah now we can get gourmet meals lol jk. On our way to McDonalds for food (not me though I'm trying to diet so I just got a diet soda) we decide that on the way back we should blaze tonight so we stop n get tha shit then go back to my place. We smoked out of Shanes bong lol it was awesome. Then Prince left at like 12ish and I think I stayed up a while talking on the comp. or doing something.

Hmm so the next day I made Amanda a new LJ. Got her pimped out.. you know. The rest of the day I spent looking through madd Donnie Darko stuff because I wanted to have a Donnie Darko theme. So yehh I made this but its not really good enough I ended up joining this layout help comm. and requested a new one. Hopefully I can have that soon.

You should join it if yuh want one: _layoutlove

Anywaaays. Later that night Amanda, Kt, Shane, and I decide we wanted to go to the Drive Ins to see the 2nd movie. Wellll Shane only has enough for him and Amanda. Then he started complaining about how he'd have no money left so we worked it out that we'd all 3 sit in the trunk and just Shane would pay. We all tried getting in at my house but everyone spazzed out and was all scared so we got out and went to a road up the street from the Drive Ins then we got in there. Amanda, Kt, and I all crunched up in the trunk lol. It was funny but we had to try and be quiet and not move. So then we get out through the opening seats in the back, but we did it pretty quiet and didn't move much.

Some guy walks up to our car like he owns it or some shit shining his flashlight in and asked Shane to see his ticket and then asked for ours. Well he goes "the lady radio'd in for one. So I had to think quick and Shane just says "they were already here" so I go "mom took our tickets when she left" and Shane said he didn't have one. The guy goes to get the lady and she comes back and she tells Shane that she knows he didn't get a ticket so I'm like "well Idk whats going on because my mom just told me he'd be here in a little bit and she left because she has to work in the morning so she told my brother to come and get us...we were waiting up at the bathrooms" and of course Shanes like "yeah I just got a call to come pick them up" and Amanda and Kt took the story so we got out of it because they couldn't prove it lol.

We didn't like the movie very much though it was kinda boring and we pretty much just weren't paying attention.

The way home we just blazed then came home and ate a little then went to sleep. Tonight I'm supposed to be going to a party in BroadAlbin I guess with Shannon, Dennine, Amanda, and maybe Kt. I'm still kinda pissed off at Shannon but she didn't do anythng with him. I know I can't trust her and thats what really pisses me off. All this time I thought I could trust her but now I've realized I can't. Well that sucksss!

Anyways though I think thats it. I'll update more some other time, leave comments<33

Livin' My Life

2004-08-26T10:15:02Z

Well whaddyuh know its been a while since I've updated because once again I've become lazy. Its been like a week or something so I'm not gonna update every little thing. Just hit the imp* shit.

My mom informed me that my hair appointment is the 31st. Which is now in 5-6 days. So once again I'm pretty excited for that. I'm actually getting it done this time. Thank god my mom got a new job..hers was down-sizing soo instead now she has a better paying job. She told me that she'd give me a lot of money for school clothes since I'm the only one going this year. Also she's buying me a new computer for Christmas and she PROMISED me that if I passed this year she'd buy me a car next year. Something like that lol. Oh yehh and my Cedar Point trip was moved to next year.

Althooouuugh my cousin Mikes girlfriend Danielle who moved here from Michigan plans on visiting there in October sometime. So she offered to take me to Cedar Point with her and prolly Crystal n Dennine or something. Hopefully that works out but I won't get my hopes up for it lol. It'd be SO awesome if I could though.

Last few days I've just been chillen. I went camping with Dennine and Amanda last night. We were driving around in the golf cart lol and Amanda kept hitting the gas and Dennine would yell at her for speeding through there. After a while we went to the front to wait for Shane and Mike who were bringing us up some weed. So we ended up jogging around the lake (don't ask) and that actually felt pretty good. Anyway, after they got there we had a campfire and we all just blazed and talked. Lol spelled our names backwards and crazy shit.

Tonight I went to Hadley w/ Am, Jenn, April, and Craig. After there we stopped at Rocco's to get some pizza. It was soo good but I was being so incredibly "rude" to the waitress according to Craig lol. Even though I was kidding around and the lady didn't even hear me. Oh well so after that I just chilled at Amz with Meg Am n Craig for the night and blazed. It was Am and Craigs 4 months today daaamn! Lol good job Am :o)

So then Meg brought me home and I've been downloading music all night and talking to Prince. Oh yeah I talk to him again lol..I dk whats going on there yet but whatevuh we're hanging out tomorrow (well its like 6 AM so more like today). I miss him so much but I'm scared, I don't wanna get feelings for him when he's moving and shit. Also I sorta have a boyfriend but I don't think he takes the relationship in any way serious at all soo I don't know whats going on there. I'm ready to just stop fucking around and find someone to be with but guys are too into the game right now so that sucks!

Fuck Dillard, he's a crackhead. Literally.

Hmmm I went to BroadAlbin a few nights lol it was ALL crazyness. Dennine and I went to Kt's farm again after that first time and Dennine rode Patches aka Fat Boy but I didn't because I didn't feel like it.

I got my schedule in the mail. Fucking Global 9 and Earth Science again. Maaaybe I'll pass the shit this time. I know it all I just never really had the......well nvm its hard to explain.

So I've decided that I need to lose weight and start working out so that I'm not a big fattie girl. Starting today I'm dieting, and I'm gonna start going to the gym with Chad.

I also want a job, but I may wait until I'm 16 to start job-hunting because nobody wants to hire a 15yr old.

I haven't talked to Earl in a while...I wonder what he's been up to lately. He hasn't been online much?

I'm so excited because its almost winter again and I know it sounds kinda crazy but I love winter. I love summer too but I think I like winter more. I love when you can smell thats its there and playing in the snow and everything ::siiigh:: only Amanda n Dennine know what I mean there lol. Plus all the holidays coming up, including Halloween and the hayrides then Christmas and AH I'm excited!!

La laaa (I like that new song by Ashlee Simpson LALA) hmm anything I missed? I'm not too sure but I think I wrote enough for now that I'm just going to stop it here. I'll let you all in on my life a little later on. Payce bitches<3

Hellllll Yeeaahhh

2004-08-16T01:39:24Z

Time for another update I suppoooose. Lol well its been only 3 days but i gotta keep up with this updating shiiit.

Alright so I'm not sure what I did the day after the buffet and all that but i remember Am called me up n we hungout the other night. Craig was being a bitch so i ended up coming home that night and blazed then went to sleep.

I'm not getting my hair done until some crazy date during the next few weeks because this lady didn't really have any openings. So I'll just update when I know whats going on with that.

Hmm made a bunch of new icons. Just been being lazy the last few days. Chilled with Dennine and Kelli last night. We walked downtown Toga for a little while but it was pretty dead so we came back and didn't do too much except sleep. Oh yeah and watched Cheers :o)

Dennine and Kt are here tonight. Dillard actually called me tonight. I was pretty excited cause I haven't talked to him in a while. It pisses me off so much that he's unreachable at times. I can't stand that...sometimes theres nobody that knows where he is.

Anywayyy he said he'd call me back later tonight. We're gonna have a long ass talk about why he does crack and why he doesn't just clean his life up. His court date is soon too. If he goes to jail I'm officially giving up on guys.

I'm very picky and its not often I find someone that I actually like a lot or have feelings for. It just happens that he's a crackhead thats supposed to be going to jail lol. Thats so dirty I feel dirty for liking him but whatever I do and theres nothing that can change how i feel towards him.

Shit I can't finish this thing w/o saying that today was so awesome. We went to get Kt and you'll never believe how crazy her house is. Amanda and I were scared to go to the door because we thought this dog was gonna attack us. Well pssh Kt told us a few minutes later that she has 9 dogs. Meaning we woulda been running from 9 dogs instead of this one little pussy one. We were blazed too. So we're just chillen in the driveway when her bro finally came up to the van then said he would go get Kt. Well then we saw this deformed looking cat with no tail lol. Next to the deformed looking dog we were scared of that had a messed up tail. Then comes another dog with the worlds craziest eyes. It was mixed with like a coyote or a horse or something and its name was Betsy. THENNN we get a tour by Donny (kinda we kinda toured it ourselves) and saw the horses and the goats. Then Dennine and I started chasing the KILLER rooster. I fucking hate roosters. They are the scariest animal evvvver. Okay enough about Kt's farm. I'll update sometime after I sleep over there cause it will be one crazy ass update. Dennine and I are determined to ride one of Kts horses. Dennine almost rode Dude. Idk why she didn't. She'd kill herself if she ever went to the farm alone.

I think I'm just gonna add in a few more things then I'm outta this joint. So yeah, laaaater<3

Candace: i`ll keep my fingers crossed
Laura: get the fuck better:o)
Kt: true redneck woman

Wee-Haw

2004-08-13T01:14:07Z

Tonight I went to a buffet, BLAZED. It was the most awesome thing ever! Lol I almost died of laughter though, Dennine and Chad were making me laugh. I was crying from laughing so hard.

I was in a bad mood for a while today. But thanks to someone I'm not anymore. Hmm :o) anyways. Tonight we were invited to Kays b-day bash or whatever. Then I called when I got home and Joelle lets us know we were un-invited. Lol so Dennine and I are just sitting here doing whatever.

Oh well, we look so fat right now I'm not sure the party woulda been too great. Plus we can just blaze here and drink here if we really wanted to.

Hahaha lmao. Theres a movie of Micheal Jackson on right now. He is the most ugly retarded thing I've ever seen. Straight went from black male to white female. Lol NASTY!!

Moving on. My dad called tonight. He wanted me to tell my mom that he got the Navy ID cards and that he'd send them out today. I was being a bitch to him. Good, he deserves it.

My mom called around to get my hair done today but instead she made an appointment for sunday. Thats some BULLLLLSHIT. Jk I don't care I just am excited to get it done.

Last night was crazy. A whole bunch of weird shit happened. Lol its okay though only Dennine, Mike, and I will really know what happened. The truuuth.

Okay well I'll update later on what I did tonight. Leave some comments for me puhhhh leeassee.

Happy B-day MY Kay
An Happy B-day Mike

Lata<3

Bitchass

2004-08-11T19:50:34Z

So whats been up lately with my life.

Hmm well just been chillen I suppose. I saw Joelle the other day, we dropped her off at Josh's and he was shooting down cats. Crazy. So mm anywaysss..I've got the pic I'm showing the lady for tomorrow when I get my hair done. I'll post that down herre more.

We cleaned the van today finally! Its so purdddy now. Now we won't have to feel like scummers when we go driving around to pick up hott guys. Psh like we do that anyway though. Lol it was pouring outside though. We had help from Amanda, she's awesome I'm glad we're friends again. She pimped out the back bed for Dennine now all we gotta do is figure out how to move the seats. Which, in time my friends, we will.

The other day I went to Stewarts Pond which was awesome as hell. Its something I'd wanna do on a hot day and pack a picnic for and shit. Some lady was bitching though which sucked. Anywhom Dennine and I did the ropeswing off of this huge ass plank it was scary as hell. I was the first girl to go and it was crazzzy. Dennine went after me, and Amandas too scared to do it. Lol its okay we love her anyway<3 and she was swimming w/ us and she was the first girl to go off the rock so thats kinda cool right? So I think we're all gonna go back some time soon.

Last night my cousin took us to this place where we thought we'd end up seeing this awesome view. Of course it was foggy and we saw nothing but a creepy ass road. He said that he'd take us some other night though when the view was better.

We scraped the bowls cause we had no weed and we got blazed then went to sleep at about 5:30 AM. Lol Dennine and I slept in Mikes bed because Chad was in mine like a scumbag that he is.

He's dating Miss Jackson! Haha, she's a hoe. A cool one though.

I think thats about it. So I'll leave yuh off here with a picture of how I'm gonna want my hair and just a goodbye. Comment if you please.

Just like that<3

Its A Great Day To Be Alive

2004-08-09T15:30:44Z

Gotta stop being lazy and keep updating this thing! While blazing with Freddy and Walker I hit a gravity bong. That was the fucking craziest thing ever. I was soo blazed...and had munchies pretty bad so Dennine and I went to McDonalds as soon as they dropped us off then from McDonalds we went and got more food from somewhere else. Then we went home, not too sure what else happened that day. I think maybe chilled with Pete? No clue. Moving on..my voice is still fucked up. That sucks. A few nights ago I got drunk and shit. Almost got into a fight lol, Dennine did. My mom said I can dye my hair this weekend! I'm so excited, I wanted to dye it before I went back to school. Mm then I get to go clothes shopping soon. I haven't really said this to anyone but I plan on going back and at least trying and then when I turn 16 if I'm doing fine and passing I'm gonna stay in school and if I'm failing miserably like before, I will just drop out. I mean I can always try for the first half of the year. I just have a tendacy of getting tired of trying and getting nowhere. And in my school district, you def. get nowhere when you try. My school is so very lame. Not much else to say. I'll post pics or something when I dye my hair and Dennines dying hers too. ALSO my mom said I can get my nose pierced soo maybe I can have that done soon too? Idk but yeah I'm def. blazing today. I'm out, laaaater<3

Alone

2004-08-06T21:46:46Z

Alright..I'm in a better mood now. I'm sorry for being such a bitch in the last entry but try hanging out with Purdy for that long straight and tell me that you don't get pissy lol.

Everythings been going so crazy lately. Fun and crazy though haha. I've been hanging out with Dennine a lot cause she's awesome. She moved out of her house now and lives in her van because her dad was being such an asshole one night and finally pushed her to the edge. We've had the cops called on us like every night for a while lol. Purdy and a few of his friends fucked shit up one night then ran so Dennine and I were waiting for the cops to come (they never did though). The next night Dillard and Earl brought Kelli, Dennine, and I to the insane asylum. Welllll me and Dennine were far too scared to go in lol but Earl took Kelli in and I stayed in the back with Dillard scared shitless to move this place was freaky as hell. Then we all went to The Saratoga State Park and broke into the peerless pool and went down the waterslides. That was fun as hell. We ran from a sheriff and Dillard grabbed my hand and threw me in the woods.

The boys watched out for us all night. They're so nice. Except Dillard is going to jail. That sucksss! We got in trouble earlier that night for dancing in the miniature golf thing. Haha Kelli gave the cop her fake ID. Crazy biiiatch.

Hmm I hung out with Pete last night. He's so incredibly hott. Lol it was fun he was with Blaze and Drake. They were all drunk and Pete was gangstuh and stole a pack of Coors Light. It was so funny he robbed it and was just jogging out. Then he made us walk downtown Toga with him and get a piece of pizza so that they could eat in front of us. Lol we pissed at Price Chopper and didn't know anybody saw us until we heard people whistling as we walked away. Hahaha that sucked. Then old men that were DRUNK hit on us. It was funny though.

Oh Yeah!! Dennine got a new kitten, but I've been taking care of it too and it kind've lives in my house. Sort of like Dennine lol she kind've lives here even though my parents wouldn't admitt that. We named the kitten Precious and its cute as hell. We went to Toga the other day and Dennine carried it in her bag. Then it shit lol and Dennine cleaned it with a paper towel then with toilet paper. Now its at Dennines house because my mom was bitching about it. Dammmnnnit!

Its been crazy but really fun.

I have to go though, Walker and Freddy are gonna come smoke with us! WOO!! Then we're gonna buy a dime bag later and just fucking blaze tonight because we haven't really gotten high in a while. Well in a day or so lol but for stoners thats kinda long. We're out :o)

I lost my voice too lol by belting out How Do I Live and Its My Life with Dennine. Now she's losing hers. Hahaha you guys only wish you were as cool as us. Jk jk..lol O M G

Later bitches (from Dennine and I)<3